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How I Overcame My Fear of Dogs and Why I Feel Like Noah

I grew up petrified of dogs. The very sight of one would have me running away and crossing the street. I remember feeling so scared, unsure of what the dog might do to me. The fear of the unknown was overwhelming, completely controlling me. I realized that I needed to understand my fear and study the role dogs play in human society.

I was born in Paris in the early ’90s. We were a Ba’al Teshuva family heavily influenced by Chabad and the local pre-war Hasidic communities that remained in France after the war. Soon, we moved to Atlanta, GA, to be with my maternal grandparents, followed by another move to Pittsburgh, PA. Pittsburgh remains one of my favorite places in America, with its  cobblestone streets, neighborhood meet-ups, and innocent way of life.

That all changed in 2002 when we moved to Monsey, NY. Suddenly, my life transformed drastically.

During my teenage years, I lived in constant confusion, fear, anxiety, sadness, and frustration, unsure of who I was or what was expected of me. Inside, I still felt like the innocent, modern American kid from Pittsburgh. All I wanted was validation and a sense of purpose, but my inner turmoil made my life tumultuous.

By 19, I found balance as a “Modernish” Jewish teenager. I went to Yeshiva in Brooklyn, NY, where I was exposed to more open perspectives than what I was raised with. I watched my first movie, attended my first baseball game, enrolled in college, and got a bank account. Each of these actions felt rebellious, as though they were sins that would lead to punishment. After years of extreme and unhealthy piety, I realized I needed to find a middle ground—and fast.

At 21, I married impulsively after knowing my wife for just three months. We had two beautiful boys, and my life gained new purpose. By then, I had found a balanced approach to Judaism, living in a small Jewish community in South Jersey. Sometimes, small events can create significant change. I remember my ex-wife making fun of me for my fear of dogs, and I knew it was time to confront that fear.

We had many ups and downs in our marriage. In an attempt to create a healthy outlet and balance, I impulsively adopted an adorable puppy and surprised my family with him about seven years ago. The first week was wonderful, but by the second week, his true behavior emerged—he started biting people, other dogs, and even children.

I quickly hired a traditional dog trainer, but I was appalled by what I saw in our first session. The trainer hit my dog, pushed him into a corner, and rolled him over on his back, then smiled at me and said, “See? He respects me now.” I remember feeling disgusted and my stomach churning at his methods. Extremism in any sphere is problematic. 

I decided to go to the library and borrow as many books as possible on dog psychology. I was fascinated to understand the inner workings of an animal that so many loved, yet some feared. Learning about their pack mentality and their sense of purpose became thrilling. What had once been a major fear turned into a quest for self-discovery, growth, and compassion.

Through my studies, I discovered an incredible dog trainer, author, and inspirational figure, Sean Ellis, also known as “The Wolfman.” Over 30 years ago, he began living with a pack of wolves in Idaho to cope with depression and PTSD. He shared how the wolves welcomed him only after he earned their trust, eventually assigning him a role within their pack. His experience taught me that, like wolves, dogs thrive in a structured, supportive pack environment. Without it, chaos, disobedience, and competition emerge.

Humans, too, need proper support and growth. A leader isn’t meant to control or manipulate but to guide, educate, and structure the pack. These life lessons became embedded in me, bringing peace, rejuvenation, and insights into life through my studies in dog psychology.

A famous quote from the Sfas Emes about Noah’s Ark asks, “Why did God save a bunch of animals? Why not just find righteous people to save?” The answer given is that animals hold the blueprint for life. They focus on survival, procreation, hunting, shelter, and family structure—essential elements that needed to be preserved for the world’s rebirth.

In many ways, I feel like Noah. As a dog trainer myself now,I help thousands find balance and instill structure, love, and guidance through their dogs. When a dog barks excessively, goes to the bathroom indoors, or acts aggressively, I help owners understand what kind of instability the dog perceives. Through organic coaching and training, we remove the triggers, stabilize the family, and give the dog a new job, fostering balance, love, and structure.

My life has been vast, filled with many stages and phases. My career and passion have given me a deep understanding of society’s inner workings and daily life. The way we fight unnecessarily, envy others, and feel anxious about losses often stems from pursuing misguided needs and desires. The dog, as man’s best friend, offers valuable lessons. By understanding their intentions and behaviors, we gain insights not only into having a well-behaved pet but into leading a more balanced life.

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  • Avatar photo Imelda Pearce says on October 31, 2024

    I used to be afraid of dogs until one bit me. Then i made up my mind not to be afraid. i knew he chased me because I was afraid. I was about 10 years old, on Riverside DR. in New York.

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