I Feel Disappointed in Orthodox Jews When They…

Sit in judgment of others, as our sages teach “Don’t judge another man until you have stood in his place.” (Ethics of the Fathers)
When they do that judging in public, as the Talmud says, “He who publicly shames his neighbor is as though he shed blood.”
When they commit acts of fraud, as the Torah says, “From a dishonest thing distance yourself.”
When they look down on less observant Jews and non-Jews, as our sages teach “Who is honored? He who gives honor to others.” (Ethics of the Fathers)
When they are afraid to speak up for what is right, as our sages teach “In a place where there are no men, strive to be one.” (Ethics of the Fathers)
When they abuse others and justify that abuse through Torah law, as Nachmanides teaches that one is able to be “navel b’rishus haTorah” – meaning people can find ways to be disgusting or immoral through acts the Torah hasn’t explicitly forbidden but which are against the way a religious Jew should live.

I feel proud of Orthodox Jews when they:

Exhibit exceptional kindness, as our sages teach, “The world stands on three things: Torah, service, and acts of loving kindness.” (Ethics of the Fathers)
Display compassion for all people as we are taught to emulate Hashem who is “El Rachum v’Chanun” (God of Mercy and Compassion).
Hold themselves to the highest standards of honesty in business, as the Talmud warns us, upon dying the first thing we will be asked is “Were you honest in your business dealings?”
Give others the benefit of the doubt, as our sages teach “Give all people the benefit of the doubt.” (Ethics of the Fathers)
Are slow to anger and easy to appease, as our sages call this person “righteous.” (Ethics of the Fathers)
Remember that “we all ought to be worried about our own souls and other people’s bellies,” as the great Rav Salanter said.

As Hillel told the would be convert who asked him to sum up the entire Torah on one foot “What is hurtful to you do not do to another. The rest is commentary.”

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Sophie says on May 1, 2015
I liked this post a lot. Thanks!!!
Jews have encountered so much hardship as victims of the violence and judgment and hatred of other people. However, this makes it no less important for us to examine what happens on the inside of our world. What’s worse….. feeling cowardly and afraid to be Jewish because of anti-semitism (will it ever end???), or feeling self-dislike and shame because of what my people do to one another?
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Allison Josephs

Allison Josephs is the founder and executive director of Jew in the City has been involved in the field of Jewish Outreach for over twenty years and is the Partner in Torah mentor to actress Mayim Bialik. She was named one of NJOP’s Top Ten Jewish Influencers and one of the Jewish Week’s 36 under 36. Allison has been quoted or written about in numerous publications, including The Wall Street Journal, The New York Times, People Magazine, NYPost, Daily News, TMZ, The Daily Beast, and Hollywood Reporter. She has appeared on numerous television and radio networks including CBS, ABC, Fox5, TLC, Associate Press TV, and NPR; her articles have appeared in publications including The Washington Post, JTA, Jewish Week, Jerusalem Post, The Forward, and Kveller. Pearson Education, the largest textbook company in the world, produced a video segment on Allison’s life for the Judaism chapter of their textbook. She is a sought-after international lecturer whose corporate clients include Con-Edison and NYU Langone and hosts a weekly podcast on the Nachum Segal Network. She received her Bachelor of Arts from Columbia University in Philosophy and lives with her husband and four children minutes from the George Washington Bridge.